News Forum - SURVEY: The BIG question – Bum Gun or Toilet Paper – final results

[MrNovax]

Team Bum Gun!  Not sure i could ever live without it now.  We even took a few back to the states and had them installed in our home there.  

[Rookiescot]

1 hour ago, Fester said:

Specially that cheap stuff that lets your finger poke through!

You should ask an ex British soldier how you can wipe your bottom using only a single sheet of "British Rail" toilet roll.

[Poolie]

4 minutes ago, MrNovax said:

Team Bum Gun!  Not sure i could ever live without it now.  We even took a few back to the states and had them installed in our home there.  

A few? How many khazis have you got?

[Fanta]

4 minutes ago, Rookiescot said:

You should ask an ex British soldier how you can wipe your bottom using only a single sheet of "British Rail" toilet roll.

John Wayne toilet paper. Rough, tough and doesn’t take crap from anybody.

I’ll stick with my Star Trek bum gun. Flies around Uranus and blasts Klingons. 

[Rookiescot]

46 minutes ago, Marble-eye said:

That might be a great idea if the shower and everything else wasn't connected to the valve that needs a complete company of the Parachute Regt to turn it on.

You can fit a small manual valve where the bum gun screws into the supply.

[Marble-eye]

21 minutes ago, Rookiescot said:

You can fit a small manual valve where the bum gun screws into the supply.

I thought I'd made my position quite clear,

I don't want a bum gun encroaching my rear,

 

Papers just fine, especially 3 ply,

 

Waters too wet, I like something dry,

 

So paper I'll use and it's in plenty supply.

 

[LEEHAI]

         

Make it simple. For the low tech innovative 

person. Take a empty dish soap squirt bottle, 

keep it full of water and have it sitting next 

to the throne. After one does his/her thing, 

then squirt your bum clean, dry with T P, 

then wash your hands, the only way to go, or 

to finish. Much, much more efficient at cleaning 

ones bum the spreading one's shit around with 

paper.......

 

[Rookiescot]

1 hour ago, Marble-eye said:

I thought I'd made my position quite clear,

I don't want a bum gun encroaching my rear,

 

Papers just fine, especially 3 ply,

 

Waters too wet, I like something dry,

 

So paper I'll use and it's in plenty supply.

Can you show us on the dolly where the bum gun touched you?

[Marble-eye]

1 minute ago, LEEHAI said:

Make it simple. For the low tech innovative 

person. Take a empty dish soap squirt bottle, 

keep it full of water and have it sitting next 

to the throne. After one does his/her thing, 

then squirt your bum clean, dry with T P, 

then wash your hands, the only way to go, or 

to finish. Much, much more efficient at cleaning 

ones bum the spreading one's shit around with 

paper.......

I am sorry but I find an initial scrape with the old 3 ply followed by a good scrub with my wife's face flannel works just fine for me. 

Any brown stains on the flannel gets put down to face powder or as I secretly call it......faeces flannel.

[HolyCowCm]

Jet spray any day, but occasional paper wipe if have to I can tolerate. Now squat toilets with plastic water scooper get a little difficult. 

[Fester]

2 hours ago, LEEHAI said:

Make it simple. For the low tech innovative 

person. Take a empty dish soap squirt bottle, 

keep it full of water and have it sitting next 

to the throne. After one does his/her thing, 

then squirt your bum clean, dry with T P, 

then wash your hands, the only way to go, or 

to finish. Much, much more efficient at cleaning 

ones bum the spreading one's shit around with 

paper.......

Aaaaaaaaaah....

[Fester]

4 hours ago, Rookiescot said:

You can fit a small manual valve where the bum gun screws into the supply.

I'll bet you can too. 

[Skip]

There's a lot to be said for "a picture is better than a thousand words"... can someone please demonstrate the proper "bum gun" technique so I can take advantage of the "guns" installed in my new house... please

[Tim_Melb]

14 hours ago, Rookiescot said:

You should ask an ex British soldier how you can wipe your bottom using only a single sheet of "British Rail" toilet roll.

Doesn't that involve tearing a piece from the centre of the sheet and keeping it to clean under the fingernail when you're done. 

[MrNovax]

On 4/5/2022 at 8:23 AM, Poolie said:

A few? How many khazis have you got?

Two bathrooms, two bum guns

[Poolie]

37 minutes ago, MrNovax said:

Two bathrooms, two bum guns

Ah. I understand a pair to be two. A few is more than that.

[Marc26]

The toilets in Japan, where it gets right up in there with nice warm water.................Those are legit!   :)