Bringing my elderly mother with dementia to Thailand

[James,]

So I spent 12 years in Thailand, been back in the UK 3 years looking after my elderly Mother.

I am now looking to move back to Thailand with her, as I am sure the level of care I could provide for her there would be way above what is possible or affordable in the UK, and ultimately a much better option for her than going into full time care here in the UK.

At the time of travel I will be 53 and she will be 91, we would both intend to use retirement visas.

However, she will not be able to meet the insurance requirement for a Non-Immigrant Visa type O, due to her age. I think the only way would be for us to come in on a 30-day visa exemption and convert to a Non O retirement in Thailand.

I understand that we would have to purchase onward flights out of the country in order to be able to fly without a visa. My concern is that we will be essentially entering on a false premise of a holiday when we are actually intending long term retirement.

This may perhaps seem obvious to the immigration officer when they are faced with my frail old Mother who does have dementia and would not really be able to give much of a coherent answer to any questioning.

I imagine the easiest way to answer a question as to the reason for travel would just be tourism. However, it would not take much thought from the immigration officer to suspect not.

Then we would need to come clean about our intentions and try to explain why we cannot come in on the correct visa.

How big of a problem could this be????

I also have some additional questions which may need a separate topic. Opening and operating her bank account, in the UK I have a lasting power of attorney LPA, I think that will not be recognized in Thailand?

Thanks for any responses. 

[Pinetree]

This may not be very helpful to you, or indeed welcome, but I think that you are out of your mind to attempt to bring the old lady here to live and die, out of her own country, out of her culture, among carers she does not understand and would find alien,  to a weather pattern she has no conception of, when she is already confused.  You may see this as a very unwelcome response, but do please  think again.  What you are proposing is borderline abuse. 

[M.O.]

You are over thinking it. Re entering Visa Exempt. I see no reason why she would not come as a tourist. Getting a break from the weather in the UK is reason enough! Without a return ticket you can just show an onward ticket (a cheap throw away one) to a neighbouring country. 

More importantly is getting set up for the change to a Non O. Eg. bank account, 800k funds (each), long term rental (or,  perhaps, you are planning on buying a condo?), etc

[M.O.]

8 minutes ago, Pinetree said:

This may not be very helpful to you, or indeed welcome, but I think that you are out of your mind to attempt to bring the old lady here to live and die, out of her own country, out of her culture, among carers she does not understand and would find alien,  to a weather pattern she has no conception of, when she is already confused.  You may see this as a very unwelcome response, but do please  think again.  What you are proposing is borderline abuse. 

I disagree. 

I have personal experience with the care situation in the UK. One month costs in the UK probably stretches to almost a year in Thailand. 

I already mentioned the weather in another post. Think about the cold, dark winters...

The culture shock is a non issue. With advanced dementia she is not going to notice the difference. 

[James,]

She will be staying with me, with carers who speak enough English to understand her needs and spend quality time with her. Most of the carers who call in for 30 mins at a time here don't have great English. 

I am sure that she will be better off, thanks.

[James,]

8 minutes ago, M.O. said:

You are over thinking it. Re entering Visa Exempt. I see no reason why she would not come as a tourist. Getting a break from the weather in the UK is reason enough! Without a return ticket you can just show an onward ticket (a cheap throw away one) to a neighbouring country. 

More importantly is getting set up for the change to a Non O. Eg. bank account, 800k funds (each), long term rental (or,  perhaps, you are planning on buying a condo?), etc

We would rent, no issues with the 800k, although may choose to just use an agent anyway. The opening and operating her bank account is a concern.

[M.O.]

4 minutes ago, James, said:

We would rent, no issues with the 800k, although may choose to just use an agent anyway. The opening and operating her bank account is a concern.

Suggest you use an agent to open your bank accounts. The bank officer may be quite understanding with regards to operation of the accounts with your Power of Attorney. You do have documentation to show? Not that he will be able to read it. Just wave it around. 

[James,]

4 minutes ago, M.O. said:

Suggest you use an agent to open your bank accounts. The bank officer may be quite understanding with regards to operation of the accounts with your Power of Attorney. You do have documentation to show? Not that he will be able to read it. Just wave it around. 

OK thanks yes, will use an agent for everything possible. Yes I have a UK LPA.

[Faz]

47 minutes ago, James, said:

However, she will not be able to meet the insurance requirement for a Non-Immigrant Visa type O, due to her age. I think the only way would be for us to come in on a 30-day visa exemption and convert to a Non O retirement in Thailand.

https://covid19.tgia.org/

https://www.tipinsure.com/CovidRegional/product_detail

 

 

 

 

[James,]

2 minutes ago, Faz said:

https://covid19.tgia.org/

https://www.tipinsure.com/CovidRegional/product_detail

Thanks, I have seen she can qualify for the required 30 day COVID insurance.

But she can't get the 90 days medical insurance required for the Non-O issued in the UK

[Faz]

Plan B, enter Visa exempt > Non O at Immigration > 1 year extension.

You still have other potential problems re your LPA.

[Breeze]

8 hours ago, James, said:

So I spent 12 years in Thailand, been back in the UK 3 years looking after my elderly Mother.

I am now looking to move back to Thailand with her, as I am sure the level of care I could provide for her there would be way above what is possible or affordable in the UK, and ultimately a much better option for her than going into full time care here in the UK.

At the time of travel I will be 53 and she will be 91, we would both intend to use retirement visas.

However, she will not be able to meet the insurance requirement for a Non-Immigrant Visa type O, due to her age. I think the only way would be for us to come in on a 30-day visa exemption and convert to a Non O retirement in Thailand.

I understand that we would have to purchase onward flights out of the country in order to be able to fly without a visa. My concern is that we will be essentially entering on a false premise of a holiday when we are actually intending long term retirement.

This may perhaps seem obvious to the immigration officer when they are faced with my frail old Mother who does have dementia and would not really be able to give much of a coherent answer to any questioning.

I imagine the easiest way to answer a question as to the reason for travel would just be tourism. However, it would not take much thought from the immigration officer to suspect not.

Then we would need to come clean about our intentions and try to explain why we cannot come in on the correct visa.

How big of a problem could this be????

I also have some additional questions which may need a separate topic. Opening and operating her bank account, in the UK I have a lasting power of attorney LPA, I think that will not be recognized in Thailand?

Thanks for any responses. 

7 hours ago, M.O. said:

I disagree. 

I have personal experience with the care situation in the UK. One month costs in the UK probably stretches to almost a year in Thailand. 

I already mentioned the weather in another post. Think about the cold, dark winters...

The culture shock is a non issue. With advanced dementia she is not going to notice the difference. 

So kind of you to do this for your mum. Thailand weather is a lot better for elderly people. I wish I was able to bring my elderly dad to live his final years in Thailand. Everytime we travelled to Thailand he was so active and a lot healthier. 

Elderly care is so much better in Thailand than in some of the western age care facilities, so I totally get what you're trying to do. 

Have you considered an Elite Visa (5 years) for your mum? Less bureaucracy from officials, if you can afford it. 

Good luck. 

[Saltire]

I would seriously investigate this further.

My mum was in a similar situation before she died in Scotland at 95 about 4 years ago.

Her last 5 years were in a care home (which did take care of her very well) but cost £3000 per month. We were forced to sell her property and only when her savings dropped to £30k did it transfer to free care. If I had thought of your idea before she became bedridden I would have seriously considered it.

I would also check out the many Thai care homes now expanding in Thailand. A quick google returned several such as this one.

https://www.facebook.com/baanlalisacm

https://www.nursinghomecm.com/

This one is in English that has dementia care

https://www.careresortchiangmai.com/index.php?viewID=6

https://www.careresortchiangmai.com/

I admire your willingness to help your mother but I know from experience how difficult this can get further down the line. A good care home could save you much anxiety.

Nursing homes in Thailand is a growing sector and the home may even be able to advise on your best visa for entry.

Good luck.

Edited May 14, 2022 by Saltire

[dbrenn]

On 5/14/2022 at 7:55 AM, Breeze said:

So kind of you to do this for your mum. Thailand weather is a lot better for elderly people. I wish I was able to bring my elderly dad to live his final years in Thailand. Everytime we travelled to Thailand he was so active and a lot healthier. 

Elderly care is so much better in Thailand than in some of the western age care facilities, so I totally get what you're trying to do. 

Have you considered an Elite Visa (5 years) for your mum? Less bureaucracy from officials, if you can afford it. 

Good luck. 

Nice post, and I also salute the OP for kindly looking after his mother. Most people would have deserted theirs.

Care homes in Britain are outrageously expensive, with frequent reports of abuse. As for cultural differences, most of the staff in British care homes hail from overseas anyway. 

[dbrenn]

On 5/14/2022 at 12:04 AM, Pinetree said:

This may not be very helpful to you, or indeed welcome, but I think that you are out of your mind to attempt to bring the old lady here to live and die, out of her own country, out of her culture, among carers she does not understand and would find alien,  to a weather pattern she has no conception of, when she is already confused.  You may see this as a very unwelcome response, but do please  think again.  What you are proposing is borderline abuse. 

The road to hell is paved with good intentions, as this post clearly shows. 

[Pinetree]

2 hours ago, dbrenn said:

The road to hell is paved with good intentions, as this post clearly shows. 

My post was not made in that vain, but was thinly vailed criticism. 

[Lbee]

Hello, 

We are currently considering moving my father ,who has dementia also, to a thai care home.

Not sure if you went along with the move but any chance you would be willing to connect to discuss it with me please? 

Its such a difficult choice especially cause we dont live there. Would appreciate any help in making the decision
 

 

[oldschooler]

On 9/7/2022 at 3:16 PM, Lbee said:

Hello, 

We are currently considering moving my father ,who has dementia also, to a thai care home.

Not sure if you went along with the move but any chance you would be willing to connect to discuss it with me please? 

Its such a difficult choice especially cause we dont live there. Would appreciate any help in making the decision
 

Not Difficult. Financial Ruin for You and your Family with Inadequate Distressing “Care “ in West or very high quality care ( just not available in West) at very low cost . It ain’t rocket science. 

[oldschooler]

On 5/13/2022 at 3:04 PM, Pinetree said:

This may not be very helpful to you, or indeed welcome, but I think that you are out of your mind to attempt to bring the old lady here to live and die, out of her own country, out of her culture, among carers she does not understand and would find alien,  to a weather pattern she has no conception of, when she is already confused.  You may see this as a very unwelcome response, but do please  think again.  What you are proposing is borderline abuse. 

Yeah Right. Instead Just commit your relative and yourself to a misery- filled zero “ care” existence, ruining yourself and family financially and mentally and say goodbye to any decent life. Yes that option has so much benefit going for it doesn’t it lAbsolute no brainer to bring such family members to Thailand at once.